Unvaccinated Man Feeling Left Out As All His Vaccinated Friends Have COVID

re: COVID
re: The Babylon Bee

Apropos.

The Babylon Bee: Unvaccinated Man Feeling Left Out As All His Vaccinated Friends Have COVID

2022-12-31

CLEVELAND, OH—Local unvaccinated man Chuck Dornley is feeling very left out this holiday season, as all his vaccinated friends have now contracted COVID. 

"Maybe I should have just gotten vaccinated," said Dornley. Then I'd have COVID like everyone else and I and my vaccinated friends would have something to talk about. Now I'm all by myself feeling healthy. Such a bummer!" 

Dornley said to reporters that he also felt left out several months ago when he got COVID himself, and everyone was calling him a "grandma killer." He hopes that once everything gets back to normal, he can go back to feeling left out for being a Cleveland Browns fan. 

WIND: can’t quite figure out when I’m supposed to get sick.